the 33rd Day without SL
This afternoon, WN, YC, FF and I were having lunch at D' piazza, it's true, we went there :) Do you think there is still not opened yet? Haha, me too, but actually there are two shops opened already, I think they are newly open, one is "big periuk" and another one is "Home Cafe". Originally, we planned to have lunch at "big periuk", but they service was too slow until we couldn't wait and swapped to "Home Cafe", there was nobody took our order even when the restaurant was full.
And, "Home Cafe" is an Old Town style cafe, they got promotion on local flavour, and their service is faster than "big periuk" with friendly staff, however their food isn't too special, please expect Old Town foods :P
Meanwhile, I also took a walk in the D'piazza Mall, it is quite big with a really huge hall, which I think can have mini concert there :) Hopefully, whole mall will be opening soon, there we can take a look with this new mall.
This evening, I just felt don't like to cook and asked LE out for dinner, we went for vegetarian food as LE's grandmother is serious condition now, she is 97 years old (I really couldn't image if I could live until this old), and now her heathy is starting decay due to aging, then LE's family are on diet (just take vegetarian foods now) for blessing her grandmum would have a happy ending. It is so amazing to live until 97, my grandmother is 85 years old now but she is still look healthy, but I found she was really old when I backed home last time and she is happy if people is holding her hand, like what I did last time.
My house actually is a shophouse, my mother rents the ground and first floor of shop to other people for business, therefore we need to live at second and third floor. When I saw my grandmum was trying to hard (by holding the ladder handle) to "climb" up until third floor, I was feeling so sad as I could see that she used a lot of energy on doing this daily routine :( I think I need to pray hard now for my grandmother'e health. Actually, she is still healthy, just with a little eyes problem, she is still strong, but I hope she would have her happy life then.
Then I just discussed with LE if this is a trend? As I found that is a lot old people past away or in serious illness recently, is this a season now? I just found that I normally got those bad news during the same period, just like last year, is this some linkage? Or just a coincident? Bless to all old people for having happy life.
Later, LE complaint her job to me, her boss was demanded too much from her and doesn't really appreciate what she is doing but just kept assigned her a lot of jobs, until she is breathless now and demotivated with her current job. Then, I hope that she can find a happy job soon, this is good for her too :)
On the way home, I was thinking about my job, I actually doesn't mind to have more work to do, but at least I can learn something (in LE's case, she is saturated) and be appreciated. But, what demotivate me now is I feel lack of team spirit in my team, I always feel that many teammates are isolated, I never had chance to have lunch with my teammates within my two years in this team, except celebration, team building or farewell, I actually feel lonely here.
When I was in my previous department, my (ex) teammates surely would call out for lunch from cube to cube and that was happy and lively memory to me. But, situation is totally different after I transferred to my current department, I need to settle my lunch alone, this makes me feel like low with team spirit and isolator from team :( When SL was on his planning to US, sometimes I was thinking to follow him due to I found hard to mix into my team as I know I will be even lonely here.
Actually, I felt lucky for sharing cube with SM two years ago, as she is the person pull me into her circle, else I think I might have to take my lonely lunch for TWO YEARS, I really can't imagine this. Well, I actually can join my husband gang for lunch, but I felt I was kind of a substitute in his gang, this makes me felt like I am a nobody there. I think I am too self-esteem, I don't like just to be a substitute. Due to that, I hope to have every single individual identity, wife is wife and husband is husband, nobody is substitute.
Actually, I did discuss about my team culture with HF, SM and Agnes, they are having the same thought, they told me that was a person resigned from team due to she couldn't bear with this kind of culture. At first, I found hard too, then I told myself this might because I was new, but now I am here for two years, I am still a stranger to them :( sometimes I would feel down, then I told myself to wait for another years, probably situation will turn good? What if all my current friends are all resign? Then I still will be alone :(
When I discussed this with MS as she joined this team longer than me, then she agreed than this is our department culture, I think this is a weird culture. Sometime, I feel I miss my previous teammates so much, so that I just sent a lunch invitation to them for lunch tomorrow, I hope they still remember me :)
Now, I am thinking if we need an initiator to start to build a strong team, and I am thinking to initiate this in the new project as it is a smaller team and easier to get started, else my teammates are too scattered in current project, this is too hard to unite them and I am lack of power to do it. Sometime, an initiator is really needed to start a new culture, else we will only stay at old thought.
And, "Home Cafe" is an Old Town style cafe, they got promotion on local flavour, and their service is faster than "big periuk" with friendly staff, however their food isn't too special, please expect Old Town foods :P
Meanwhile, I also took a walk in the D'piazza Mall, it is quite big with a really huge hall, which I think can have mini concert there :) Hopefully, whole mall will be opening soon, there we can take a look with this new mall.
This evening, I just felt don't like to cook and asked LE out for dinner, we went for vegetarian food as LE's grandmother is serious condition now, she is 97 years old (I really couldn't image if I could live until this old), and now her heathy is starting decay due to aging, then LE's family are on diet (just take vegetarian foods now) for blessing her grandmum would have a happy ending. It is so amazing to live until 97, my grandmother is 85 years old now but she is still look healthy, but I found she was really old when I backed home last time and she is happy if people is holding her hand, like what I did last time.
My house actually is a shophouse, my mother rents the ground and first floor of shop to other people for business, therefore we need to live at second and third floor. When I saw my grandmum was trying to hard (by holding the ladder handle) to "climb" up until third floor, I was feeling so sad as I could see that she used a lot of energy on doing this daily routine :( I think I need to pray hard now for my grandmother'e health. Actually, she is still healthy, just with a little eyes problem, she is still strong, but I hope she would have her happy life then.
Then I just discussed with LE if this is a trend? As I found that is a lot old people past away or in serious illness recently, is this a season now? I just found that I normally got those bad news during the same period, just like last year, is this some linkage? Or just a coincident? Bless to all old people for having happy life.
Later, LE complaint her job to me, her boss was demanded too much from her and doesn't really appreciate what she is doing but just kept assigned her a lot of jobs, until she is breathless now and demotivated with her current job. Then, I hope that she can find a happy job soon, this is good for her too :)
On the way home, I was thinking about my job, I actually doesn't mind to have more work to do, but at least I can learn something (in LE's case, she is saturated) and be appreciated. But, what demotivate me now is I feel lack of team spirit in my team, I always feel that many teammates are isolated, I never had chance to have lunch with my teammates within my two years in this team, except celebration, team building or farewell, I actually feel lonely here.
When I was in my previous department, my (ex) teammates surely would call out for lunch from cube to cube and that was happy and lively memory to me. But, situation is totally different after I transferred to my current department, I need to settle my lunch alone, this makes me feel like low with team spirit and isolator from team :( When SL was on his planning to US, sometimes I was thinking to follow him due to I found hard to mix into my team as I know I will be even lonely here.
Actually, I felt lucky for sharing cube with SM two years ago, as she is the person pull me into her circle, else I think I might have to take my lonely lunch for TWO YEARS, I really can't imagine this. Well, I actually can join my husband gang for lunch, but I felt I was kind of a substitute in his gang, this makes me felt like I am a nobody there. I think I am too self-esteem, I don't like just to be a substitute. Due to that, I hope to have every single individual identity, wife is wife and husband is husband, nobody is substitute.
Actually, I did discuss about my team culture with HF, SM and Agnes, they are having the same thought, they told me that was a person resigned from team due to she couldn't bear with this kind of culture. At first, I found hard too, then I told myself this might because I was new, but now I am here for two years, I am still a stranger to them :( sometimes I would feel down, then I told myself to wait for another years, probably situation will turn good? What if all my current friends are all resign? Then I still will be alone :(
When I discussed this with MS as she joined this team longer than me, then she agreed than this is our department culture, I think this is a weird culture. Sometime, I feel I miss my previous teammates so much, so that I just sent a lunch invitation to them for lunch tomorrow, I hope they still remember me :)
Now, I am thinking if we need an initiator to start to build a strong team, and I am thinking to initiate this in the new project as it is a smaller team and easier to get started, else my teammates are too scattered in current project, this is too hard to unite them and I am lack of power to do it. Sometime, an initiator is really needed to start a new culture, else we will only stay at old thought.
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michelle
michelle